when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize