u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
