that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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