Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i would one night stand the shit outta him
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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