why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
