What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
