in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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