whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
