did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
