I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
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He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
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My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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