just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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