I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
