is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
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Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
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Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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