Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
