so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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