I heard we made out
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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