Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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