You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
