I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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