i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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