So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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