My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize