Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
