U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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