I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
