Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
