Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes http://tfl.nu/awap
  Replies (11) Good night (535) Bad night (757) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!" http://tfl.nu/r6a4
  Replies (25) Good night (3405) Bad night (1175) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer http://tfl.nu/qmj6
  Replies (102) Good night (1235) Bad night (3655) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup. http://tfl.nu/xbnm
  Replies (156) Good night (1267) Bad night (2579) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera. http://tfl.nu/u22v
  Replies (28) Good night (645) Bad night (2243) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?

  (1-705): View more from Ontario

  That would be awkward if he commented on your status

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom? (1-705): That would be awkward if he commented on your status http://tfl.nu/877y
  Replies (18) Good night (787) Bad night (2632)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds http://tfl.nu/xs1z
  Replies (112) Good night (2862) Bad night (786) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  You can't date a girl from every country.

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I'm the captain planet of women

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): You can't date a girl from every country. (770): I'm the captain planet of women http://tfl.nu/8wp1
  Replies (19) Good night (4914) Bad night (474)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form? http://tfl.nu/l7lr
  Replies (108) Good night (1308) Bad night (4691) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl. http://tfl.nu/kow0
  Replies (20) Good night (820) Bad night (6464) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that. http://tfl.nu/isuw
  Replies (31) Good night (5164) Bad night (2076) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol. http://tfl.nu/s5um
  Replies (10) Good night (6055) Bad night (1235) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system. http://tfl.nu/14j2
  Replies (16) Good night (1047) Bad night (3888)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on? http://tfl.nu/ru4x
  Replies (20) Good night (3574) Bad night (1226) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...

  (567): View more from Ohio

  Keep it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate... (567): Keep it. http://tfl.nu/x8n2
  Replies (0) Good night (867) Bad night (352)

Randomize