You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize
