I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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