I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
