So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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