I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
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