dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize