Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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