i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize