Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
