There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize