You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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