smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
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