Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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