hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
you inspire me to be a worse person
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
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I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
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I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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