i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
