Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
