If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
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It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
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Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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