did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
