everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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