Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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