I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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