Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
