Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
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