somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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